What to Write In a Father’s Day Card If You’re Not Close
Father’s Day is creeping up, and you’re staring at a blank card, wondering how to fill it for a dad you’re not exactly tight with.
Been there, right? Whether it’s a strained relationship, years of distance, or just that awkward “we don’t really talk” vibe, writing something heartfelt without sounding fake is tough.
I’ve wrestled with this myself, trying to pen something for my own dad that didn’t feel like it was ripped from a Hallmark script.
Let’s figure this out together—here’s how to craft a Father’s Day card message that’s genuine, respectful, and maybe even a little warm, without overdoing it.
Why Writing This Card Matters (Even If It Feels Weird)
Okay, first off, why bother? If you’re not close, it’s tempting to skip the card altogether.
But hear me out: a small gesture like this can mean more than you think. It’s not about fixing everything—it’s about acknowledging the day and showing a bit of respect. Plus, who knows?
It might plant a seed for something better down the road. Ever wonder if a simple note could shift things just a smidge? Here’s why it’s worth the effort:
- It shows you’re trying: Even a short message says, “Hey, I’m thinking about you.”
- It’s low pressure: A card doesn’t demand a deep convo—it’s just a moment of connection.
- It’s respectful: Recognizing Father’s Day honors his role, even if the relationship isn’t perfect.
When I sent my dad a card after years of radio silence, it didn’t magically fix things, but it opened the door to a slightly less awkward phone call. Small wins, you know?
Keep It Short and Sweet (No Novel Required)
If you’re not close, you don’t need to pour your heart out. A long, mushy message might feel forced, and let’s be real—neither of you wants that.
Aim for short, sincere, and specific. You want to say something that feels true without diving into emotional territory you’re not ready for. Here’s how to nail it:
Stick to Neutral, Positive Vibes
Focus on something safe and kind. Avoid heavy emotions or past baggage.
Think about a general wish or a light memory. For example:
- “Happy Father’s Day, Dad! Hope you’re enjoying your day.”
- “Thinking of you this Father’s Day—wishing you all the best!”
Add a Tiny Personal Touch
If you can, toss in one specific detail to make it feel less generic.
Maybe it’s a nod to something you know he likes. I once wrote, “Hope you’re out fishing this Father’s Day—that lake’s calling your name!” because my dad’s obsessed with his fishing trips.
It showed I paid attention without getting too deep.
Avoid Over-the-Top Sentiment
Steer clear of “You’re the best dad ever” if it doesn’t ring true.
It’ll sound fake, and you’ll cringe writing it. Instead, go for something like, “Thanks for everything you do.” It’s kind but doesn’t overpromise.
Sample Messages for Different Situations
Not sure where to start? Here are a few ideas tailored to different “not close” scenarios.
Tweak them to fit your vibe, but these should give you a jumping-off point.
FYI, I’ve used these or versions of them, and they’ve landed well without stirring up drama.
For a Dad You Barely Talk To
- “Hey Dad, Happy Father’s Day! Hope you’re having a great day and enjoying some downtime.”
- “Wishing you a happy Father’s Day, Dad. Thanks for all you do—hope you’re well!”
For a Dad You’re Estranged From
- “Happy Father’s Day, Dad. Thinking of you and wishing you a good day.”
- “Just wanted to say Happy Father’s Day. Hope things are going well for you.”
For a Stepdad or Bonus Dad
- “Happy Father’s Day! Thanks for being there—hope you have a great day.”
- “Wishing you a great Father’s Day. Appreciating all you do for the family!”
Pro tip: If you’re really stuck, mention the day itself.
Something like, “Hope you’re soaking up Father’s Day!” works because it’s cheerful and doesn’t require you to get too personal.
Things to Avoid (Trust Me on This)
Okay, let’s talk about what not to do.
I’ve made the mistake of overthinking a card and ending up with something that felt… off. Here’s what to steer clear of to keep things smooth:
- Don’t bring up old fights: The card isn’t the place to rehash why you don’t talk. Keep it positive.
- Skip the guilt trip: Lines like “Wish we were closer” might seem sweet, but they can come off as loaded.
- Avoid generic fluff: If it sounds like it could be in every card at the drugstore, rewrite it. Nobody wants “You’re my hero” if it’s not true.
- Don’t promise future plans: Saying “Let’s catch up soon!” is risky if you don’t mean it. Keep it present-focused.
I once wrote something about “hoping to reconnect” and regretted it when my dad took it literally. Lesson learned: stick to the moment.
How to Make the Card Feel More “You”
Even if you’re keeping it short, you can add a dash of your personality to make it authentic.
Ever notice how a little quirk can make a note feel more human? Here’s how to do it:
Use Your Voice
Write like you talk. If you’re a bit sarcastic, maybe go with, “Happy Father’s Day, Dad—don’t party too hard!”
If you’re more earnest, try, “Wishing you a really great Father’s Day, Dad.” The key is to sound like you, not a greeting card bot.
Include a Shared Memory (If It’s Safe)
If there’s a neutral, happy memory you can reference, it can warm things up.
For example, “I still remember those summer BBQs—hope you’re grilling this Father’s Day!” Just make sure it’s not tied to any tension.
Sign It Thoughtfully
Your sign-off matters.
A simple “Love, [Your Name]” is fine, but if that feels too much, try “From, [Your Name]” or “Best, [Your Name].” I go with “From” when I’m keeping it neutral—it’s warm but not over-the-top.
What If You’re Still Stuck?
If you’re sitting there, pen in hand, and nothing’s coming, don’t panic.
Take a breather and try this: write what you’d say if you ran into him at a coffee shop.
Keep it light, like you’re just saying hi. You could also ask yourself, “What’s one thing I can truthfully thank him for?”
Even if it’s small, like “Thanks for teaching me how to change a tire,” it’s a start.
Another trick? Flip through old photos or texts for inspiration.
I found an old picture of my dad and me at a baseball game, and it sparked a line about hoping he catches a game this Father’s Day.
Little things like that can jog your memory without getting too heavy.
Wrapping It Up: You’ve Got This
So, there you go—your game plan for writing a Father’s Day card that’s sincere without being awkward.
It doesn’t have to be perfect, and it doesn’t have to fix everything.
Just a few kind words, maybe a personal touch, and you’re golden. IMO, the fact that you’re even trying says a lot.
What’s the worst that could happen? You send a card, he reads it, and maybe, just maybe, it’s a tiny step toward something better.
Or at least you’ve checked “Father’s Day” off your to-do list. Either way, pat yourself on the back.
Author Profile
- Hi, I’m Megan Hernandez – proud single mum of two and the brain behind this blog.
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